The Honor of a Challenging Process

Service, support, and the best of humanity

I’ve spent much of the last couple of weeks working with my mom to handle a challenging family situation.  Now that the majority of the work is behind us, healing and growing past the frustrations, anger and fear is our main focus.

As I think about moving forward, I know that the fastest, most healthy way to do that is for everyone involved to continue to be honest, supportive and collaborative.

So, as I came here to write about business this morning I am can only think of how important personal relationships are to EVERY aspect or our lives.  Here are a few insights as I think about these weeks:

  • Even though I work to understand and appreciate my colleagues, family and friends, I now see how much I project my ideas, wishes, and requirements on to them.  I now have a renewed interest in knowing and accepting others as they are.
  • Most human beings want to help and support other human beings.  People I did not know 10 days ago have shared amazing compassion, care, and effort with me and my mom. They helped to turn a very challenging process into one where I got to experience the best humanity has to offer.
  • The net of support is wider than we imagine when we are engrossed in the events of our days. My dear uncle in Michigan shared that our family there was thinking of us often, bringing tears to my eyes as I felt their caring from many miles away.
  • Being of true service to another is an honor.  This does not mean I can go through it without frustration, anger, and fear; however when I am reminded that my efforts are supporting my dear mom and step-dad, I can relax a bit and know that life is okay.

What are the lessons you have learned from challenging journeys?  Please share and let us all learn from you by commenting below.

Joyful regards,

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5 thoughts on “The Honor of a Challenging Process

  1. Your first bullet point is very insightful and I continue to be challenged with knowing and accepting others as they are. Regarding social services, I learned that every hospital patient is assigned a social worker to help with access to community services, for counseling and brokering family relationships. I also made use of a caregiver counselor, provided by Area Agencies on Aging and other agencies, who gave me support when parents were pushing my dormant adolescent buttons. Both of my parents were seriously ill at the same time while I had young children at home. Ultimately, it was very rewarding to have such a deep relationship with my mother at the end of her life, bringing our relationship full circle. What a blessing it was that my 2 brothers and I were able to work together regarding their care. Wishing you, your mother and step-dad all the best.

    • Thank you Laurie for your response, insights and ideas. I also believe that accepting others is related to accepting ourselves, and agree that it is a livelong journey. I also love what you said about “bringing your relationship full circle.” As I now have time to process, I realize how much closer I am to other family members as well. Thanks for helping me to feel that fully too.

      I am sorry for your loss of your mother.

      Warmly, Lisa

  2. After talking to my dad last night something hit home, hard, and that is we all really do want the same things in life…..peace, happiness, safety, support, love, ect, and we need them the most when we are the most disagreeable. He sounded more grounded than he has in awhile; he’s still angry and frustrated and ornery but I can hear in his voice that his feet are now touching the ground. I thank you from my heart for helping him in attaining it. I also thank you in helping me keep on task. I would not have done that without your encouragement to do so. Even if I had not run out to Palm Springs I would have had trouble keeping my concentration at work, school and even home. I hope everything is settled with Jeff’s family and you both can breath. I send love and hugs.

    • Thank you so much Marla, for this message and your support. You are so right, it takes a village and keeping an open mind. I am enjoying being back in MA and with Jeff. Hugs to you and your part of the team in NY. 😉